Updated: Jan 3, 2020
The other night I was at a friend's house watching one of my all-time favorite movies, Shrek. Honestly, that movie is even more hilarious now that I'm an adult. By the way, my mom never fails to remind me that she almost named me Fiona instead of Maija, could you imagine? Yeah, me neither. Thanks, mom!
Anyways, one of the main themes in the movie is that Princess Fiona is looking to be rescued from her prison-tower and life long curse by true-love's kiss in a steamy, romantic, and well thought out scene. Fast forward to the end, this half-princess-half-ogre heroine ends up falling in love with Shrek, an ogre only after she learns to accept who she truly is, an ugly ogre (somebody had to say it).
As a young girl, I remember one day also imagining falling in love and imagining what that'd look like. Our notion of falling in love and true love is often referred to as coming from someone outside of ourselves. While that feeling of falling in love and starting a new exciting romance with someone else is amazing, it's more important that we focus on falling in love and starting an exciting romance with ourselves. What does self-love mean to me? To put it simply; Self-Love is a superpower. If we are constantly focused on how other people perceive us and neglecting to improve how we view ourselves, we will always be in a mindset of deficiency. Figuring out what is best for you, despite how others may see it, and making the choice to live that out freely is the path to self-love.
New Year, New You? Self-love also means no more self-sabotaging. Wake up, it's 2020! I know I've been guilty of getting in my own way and blocking my blessings, in more ways than I'm proud to admit. Whether it was because of fear, imposter-syndrome, or just plain laziness, the list goes on! The opportunity to change this pattern is to become aware of it at the moment and fight through the excuses you tell yourself. My suggestion is to get to the bottom of whatever is holding you back and face it head-on.
Oh and, one more thing we're leaving behind in 2019: No more procrastinating. Okay, maybe just a little bit, let's be realistic. In the long run, we know that when we do what we have to do, we are ultimately tending to our needs. Responsibility isn't always fun, but it's for our own good.
Self-love is making conscious decisions to live a healthy lifestyle, taking measures to limit stress and anxiety as much as possible, and knowing that even on your worst days, your best is good enough. Remember, this is a marathon. This is your reminder to be patient with yourself.
One of the most cherished words of advice that I received from my grandmother before she passed in 2015 is this:
"God never requires us to succeed. He only requires that we try".
In what ways are you going to start and/or continue to practice self-love in your everyday life?
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